Wednesday, November 27, 2013

Relationships: What Women Don’t Understand About Men

   The differences between men and women couldn’t be any clearer than it is in women’s romance novels. The men in these stories are strong, brave and true but that is only the template. What is really brought to the reader’s attention is how attentive the male characters are. They listen to the women, defer to their judgment, and constantly tell them in the most romantic way possible just how beautiful they are, how sexy they are, how important they are to the man’s happiness.

   Seriously, it’s hilarious!

   There are only two real male personalities that actually act in that manner, gay guys and playas. This is why women like having gay guys as friends because they listen, compliment them by telling them how beautiful and sexy they are and see to their needs.

   Playas understand it too, which is why women are constantly surprised when playas romance the hell out of them, then, once the sex is over, its ‘Buh-Bye.”

   Scott Adams the ‘Dilbert’ cartoonist gives what I think is the best explanation as to why women are so disappointed with men.

   The scene begins with a woman coming to Dogbert for advice.

   Woman: I’m considering dating man but I’m worried.

   Dogbert: What’s his name?

   Woman: Bill… His name is Bill.

   Dogbert: Ahh… Bill… Yes, I know all about Bill. He has no emotional depth and thinks of your conversations as mere chatter. He wants your body, not your mind. Several times a day, Bill imagines himself with different women.

   Woman (disappointed) Darn, This time I thought I’d found a normal guy.

   Dogbert: Okay, then I have some really bad news for you.

   Real men are nothing like the men portrayed in romance novels. Not like most of the men portrayed on TV. But women don’t want to accept this and firmly believe the man who is just like those portrayed in romance novels is out there and all she needs to do is find him.

   Good luck with that!

   Because if you do find him, don’t be surprised if somewhere down the line he announces that he has a secret boyfriend. Or learn that not only is he the most romantic guy to you, he is also the most romantic guy to a bunch of other women he is banging.

  Or worse, a woman goes after a ‘Bad Boy’. On the TV show ‘The Big Bang Theory’ the attractive female friend ‘Penny’ complains to Leonard and Sheldon that, “I’m always dating guys who only think about themselves, treat me like dirt and break my heart. What’s wrong with me, am I stupid?”

   To which, after a moment’s thought, Sheldon replies. “Yes, you are.”

   And she is! Why? Because she let her ego convince her that she could ‘change him’ with her super-duper sexuality.

   Ladies, I’ve written books on Marriage and Divorce and I’m going to save you a lot of pain and misery by telling you the hard and unvarnished truth.

   Stop searching for a man who will sweep you off your feet with romance and passion. Every one of those guys has something up his sleeve that will break your heart.

   Here’s what to look for instead. Find a guy who truly likes you. Love fades but a strong friendship can last a lifetime. Find a guy who is kind when he doesn’t have to be. Find a guy who is strong during difficult times, who values your opinion, who is stable, fair and honest.

  And yes, over time he very well may become a balding, potbellied, beer drinking football watching, fart machine but he will always put the welfare of you and the kids first, and he’ll be faithful, be a great father and role model, a passionate lover, a solid provider and your best friend.

   And if that’s not enough, then don’t get married because, believe me, it will not end well.

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