Monday, December 31, 2012

The Best Male & Female Singer of the 20th Century

   The holiday season provides a good selection of singing talent from the mid thirties to centuries end. Before then the technology was in its infancy and couldn’t provide a true representation of the artist’s voice. But since that time nearly all top vocalists recorded a Christmas song or album and this season gave me the opportunity to stage my own American Idol contest.

   The question: Who was the best male and female singer of the 20th century?

   What’s interesting is that I don’t have a horse in this race. Very few of the singers from my generation really qualified. This is not to say we lacked great singers, we didn’t but in this competition the singers were rated by their ability to sing at all three levels. Soft ballads (James Taylor, Karen Carpenter, Perry Como) Mid range (Sinatra, Johnny Cash, Judy Garland) and pure power ( Robert Plant, Amy Lee, Robert Goulet) and frankly the singers of my era (mid-sixties on) could do one or two easily but rarely all three.

   Surprisingly, one singer, once you really pay attention, truly stands out. And when I compared his singing to the other well known male greats (Sinatra, Nat Cole, Perry Como) you realize just how much fuller, stronger and more resonate his voice is. This especially surprised me because I had been listening to him sing on TV for the better part of my young life and hadn’t really paid attention. But once I did I was impressed. Who is it?  It’s Der Bingle, Bing Crosby himself. Helluva voice, helluva talent, but not the winner.

   “Another even better, there is!” says Yoda

   On the female side, there is one who, like Crosby when compared to the rest really stands out. She can sing ballads and has done many well, breezes right through mid-range songs and when called upon has shown she can belt it out with the best of them. “Whoszat?” you ask. Why it our favorite Mama, Cass Elliot. Truly a great voice. Second runner up is Karen Carpenter, another great voice, who, like Cass died before she had the chance to break from her comfort zone and really show us what she could do.

   But there is one still better.

   Before we go to the final selection I will point out that my choices come from well known popular singers. I’m not going to entertain suggestions that this opera singer, or that country western vocalist, or some obscure gospel singer was much better. My position is if they were indeed that much better, they would have been more well known.

   The winner in both categories is well known, one more than the other but both pack a wallop when it comes to talent. My standard of judging was simple I used that old saw: THE TRULY GREAT ONES MAKE IT LOOK EASY. The Muhammed Ali ‘s, the Babe Ruth’s,  the Albert Einstein’s, the Tiger Woods, The Zackary Richards’,The Beatles. And so I chose this male singer because of his performance of this Christmas song

   It starts as a ballad become mid-range in the middle and goes full blast power at the conclusion. This guy handled all three forms with amazing ease. Perhaps the best representation of this guy’s awesome vocal talent.

   I chose this female because of her duet in this song     The male singer is steady giving the female the room to light up the tune with vocal pyrotechnics, going from near whisper in the beginning to mid-range to full blast power with amazing ease.

   And select one or more of these truly great books for your electronic device. And they all come with a 30 day money–back guarantee should you not like it. How many other companies offer that kind of deal?

   That being said, Happy New Year everyone!

Monday, December 24, 2012

A Christmas Without Presents

   Following my divorce, and with the missus out of the picture, (so far out she refused to tell anyone where she lived for the first few years) me, my daughters and the other family members had to make adjustments for the holidays. My family, as well as my brother’s and sister’s usually went to our mothers for dinner on Christmas Day, but that came to an end when my mother turned 80 and although she claimed she loved having the family over, it was clearly time for a changing of the guard.

   When I was young everyone in my family lived within an hour’s ride of each other and we’d all usually meet at my grandparent’s place. Then as they grew older, it switched to my mother’s. It was pretty much expected to switch to mine once my mother threw in the towel.

   But the world had changed.
   For one thing nobody lived within an hour’s ride anymore. Some of us had to work at least part of Thanksgiving or Christmas. And there had been divorces which complicated things with the kids having to spend the holidays with the parent they weren’t living with.

   If progress had made things so much easier, why was there so much more stress?

   One issue was with my oldest daughter, who at the time was in her final year of college, was flying all over the country to meet with potential employers, plus she was holding down a job. 

   We ran into each other in a video store shortly before Christmas and were desperately trying to work out a schedule so we could all be together Christmas Day. I won’t bore you with the details but a lot of things had to be moved around.

   We were at the counter ready to pay for our movies and had just about finalized the rescheduling when the counterman asked: “And would you like to contribute one dollar to benefit the helpless, starving,  babies of  Elbownia?” ( Or some charity, I don’t remember which.)

   Just as I thought my daughter and I had worked everything out, I remembered something else that would cause more juggling. Now even more frustrated and not paying attention to the counterman, I only caught part of what he said, so I spun my head to him and in a clearly irritated voice said, “What!?”

   At that point my daughter had come up with a way around my problem and as she explained, the counterman again asked if I would like… contribute… to help… blah, blah, blah, Elbownia…”

   I quickly spun back to him and said, “F*#k ‘em.”

   Apparently not expecting that answer, he pulled back and said, “F*#k the helpless, starving babies of Elbownia?”

   That comment caught my attention and I again spun and said, “What the hell are you talking about?” And as the words flew from my mouth I saw the big orange button on his vest featuring some hungry waif with hands extended in that Oliver Twist, “Please, sir. May I have some more?’ expression.

   At this point my daughter is howling with laughter as is the counterman. Furious with myself and everything else, I contributed whatever singles I had and left with my daughter. As we walked to our respective cars I apologized for my behavior.

   She , of course, said she understood. “It’s Christmas season, everyone goes a little crazy this time of year. I’m only halfway done with my Christmas shopping and there’s only a few days left. It’s hectic, what can you do?”

   “This isn’t what Christmas is supposed to be about,” I said, really meaning it.

   So when we all gathered on Christmas day, I said that since none of us had any young children, I suggested we stop giving each other presents at Christmas and instead have a catered dinner at my house for the entire family.

   That suggestion received overwhelming support, and a considerable number of sighs of relief.

   So that’s what we’ve been doing the last 8 years. And so tomorrow I’ll be dining with my mother, sister, brother, daughters and their boyfriends along with Bella the bull dog and Stewie the Italian greyhound.

   Plus they’ll be one new addition.

   My daughters asked if my ex (their mother) could come as well.


   Ah, what the hell, it’s Christmas, right?

   So from me and mine, to you and yours, have a wonderful Christmas and may your days be merry and bright.

Monday, December 17, 2012

Self Righteous Douche-bags Doth Vex Me

   I didn’t do my usual posts on Facebook over the weekend, just a few pretty pictures in the hope of raising spirits following Friday’s horrific event in Connecticut. What I did notice was the self-righteous douche-baggery of some of the Facebook comments. 
   Following the tragedy came the usual call for the immediate ban of all privately owned firearms. And as usual, the people calling for disarmament were from people who don’t own guns, have never owned guns, would never own guns and cannot understand why a person who does own guns wouldn’t immediately dispose of them in light of the recent school shootings. And as usual these commenters completely ignored the horrifically violent consequences of attempting to forcibly disarm the American public, or that a disarmed populace could fall under the rule of a dictator or at the very least find themselves at the mercy of some lunatic who has broken into their home.

    Apparently it’s more important to these people to bemoan cruel fate and point accusingly at those not as enlightened, than it is to buckle down and create possible solutions.

   People need to remember the United States is a cowboy country, birthed in blood and violence. The American people have always had the right to own guns and have handled that responsibility well over the last 200 plus years considering what a diverse nation we are. Since the school shootings are a relatively new event, we should instead look into what has changed over the past two decades.

   One possibility may be the ultra-violent video games. Having written several young adult novels and having met these teens during my book tours, I can tell you from firsthand experience that young people are VERY impressionable. So our first step should be  to stop them from viewing games that promote cruelty, sadism and torturous violence and instead reinforce the basic values we were taught as kids. My suggestions:
·             No graphically violent video games may be sold to or viewed by anyone under 18. Shops that sell them would be under the same restrictions as selling alcohol. Adults owning such games would be required to keep them locked away. And if any child is found in the possession of a violent video game, the owner of that game would be fined $1,000.00
·             If you don’t already, staring bringing your child to religious services. My generation was dragged to our respective houses of worship every week and overall, we turned out all right. Instilling a strong sense of right and wrong early can keep a kid on the right path when life gets tough and may help cut down on the rising rate of teen suicides.
·             Teach your kids to defend themselves. And back them up when necessary. Most of these rampages were from kids who were bullied and ostracized. When my daughter was bullied in the 2nd grade, I went to the principal and told him to make it stop. He explained that the bully came from a broken home and had ‘Issues’. I explained that the next time that kid laid a hand on my daughter, she was going to retaliate. So I taught her how to fight. The next time he punched her in the stomach, she gave him a black eye and a fat lip.   
He never bothered her again.

   But clearly those suggestions won’t be enough. We need to come up with a reasonable compromise on the rules that both sides can agree on. For example:
·               Any person ever diagnosed with a mental illness may not purchase, receive or possess any type of firearm EVER.
·               Any person owning a gun must be able to provide a receipt of that purchase. Doesn’t matter where it was bought but there must be a proper bill of sale and if that person loses it, he/she would have to turn in the gun to authorities. 
·               A person convicted of a crime indicating a lack of personal responsibility like drunk-driving, domestic violence, child abuse, or illegal drug possession, would be banned from possessing a firearm.
·               Any person purchasing a firearm would have to prove they possess a security system to prevent theft, like an alarm system or gun safe.
·               All gun owners would be required by law to have trigger locks on ALL their guns when not on their person.
·               And most importantly, the gun owner would be held personally responsible for any action or crime committed by the use of that firearm. 

   My point? Self-righteous douche-baggery begins with one person trying to force his or her views on someone else without taking into consideration the valid points of the opposition. Gun ownership is an American right, but that being said, it is also a HUGE responsibility. And if gun-owners want to keep that right, they MUST make absolutely sure they are the ONLY person with access to their firearms and in addition, should wholeheartedly support severe penalties on gun owners and gun sellers who are lax, irresponsible and whose weaponry is getting our loved ones killed.

   If you agree, SHARE on Facebook or Retweet.

Monday, December 10, 2012

My Plans For World Domination

   After I have seized power and my quest for world domination has been achieved, the first thing I am going to do is enact two new laws. The first is the Dark Side Law and the second is the Too Stupid to Live Law.
   I’ll explain.
   We, as a people, have become addicted to feeling good about ourselves. Everyone raves about the latest ‘feel good’ book, or movie of the year. Nowadays, everyone is ready to forgive and forget as long as the criminal appears repentant and more importantly, the criminal act didn’t involve them or anyone they care about.
   Although mankind consists mostly of puddin’heads, the hypersensitive and assorted doofi, they, for some inexplicable reason, consider themselves intellectuals and socially enlightened, and will likely continue to philosophize and attempt to fathom the unfathomable for as long as it makes them feel all gooey and warm inside, or until the bad guys climb the stairs of their Ivory Towers and kill them.
   Ergo, the necessity of enacting these laws.
   Both the Dark Side and the Too Stupid to Live laws are easy to understand. Under the Dark Side law, those who intentionally go to the dark side will be required to accept whatever happens to them while there.

  For example: Pizza Guy is cleaning the oven with industrial strength oven cleaner. Bad Guy comes up from behind, pulls a gun and threatens to kill him if he doesn’t empty the cash register. Instead of complying,  Pizza Guy spins around and sprays cleaner into Bad Guy’s eyes, permanently blinding him. With the Dark Side Rules in effect, the robber would have no legal recourse, no access to welfare or disability compensation, nothing. The point is, he knowingly entered the Dark Side by pulling a gun and attempting to rob Pizza Guy. No need for police, lawyers or insurance people to get involved. No bewailing of life’s cruel fate, no calls for compassion, pity or understanding as to why one man would try to rob another. It would simply boil down to this: The robber pulled the lever on the devil’s shot machine and instead of winning the Jackpot, it took his eyesight.

   Thank you for playing.

   The Too Stupid to Live Laws would protect us from stupid people, whose actions endanger us and those we love. We all know how bad the weather has gotten. Every day there’s another story about some place being blown to smithereens, buried by an earthquake or wiped out by a tsunami, and there are always those who insist on staying behind to ride it out.

   They have every right to do so.
   But like the Dark Side law, once they make that decision they have to live with the consequences. Take this theoretical example: The national weather service has announced a ‘Run like Hell’ warning to residents of the states bordering the Gulf of Mexico. Reporting that Superstorm George Clooney has winds of 600 miles an hour and has ripped the island of Bermuda off the map and dropped it somewhere north of New Orleans. Hoards of meat eating locust have essentially ‘chowed-down’ on the kind folks of the Mississippi Delta. Godzilla has touched down in central Texas and immediately instituted his own form of barbequing, unfortunately the barbequees were the residents of the area. 

  When interviewed, a lifelong resident of the most afflicted area, colorfully named ‘Rootin-Tootin’ Sam McBob, claimed he ‘wasn’t afeared. And that he ‘wasn’t going to let a little wind and rain chase him from his home of 30 years, no sir!’

   His wife Clarabelle McBob echoed his sentiments. “Sure as shootin’ we ain’t goin’ nowhere.’ When asked if her husband’s colorful name was due to his self-sufficient, pioneer spirit, she replied, “No, he got named that due to his jock itch and flatulence problem.”

   Sure enough, once Superstorm George Clooney hit, they were singing a different tune. Clinging to the top of a flagpole for dear life, and surrounded by increasingly turbulent waters, they desperately called 911for help. But under the Too Stupid to Live Laws, there would be no one to answer because the first responders, after evacuating everyone,  followed their government’s ‘Run Like Hell’ directive and like all the other responsible, clear-thinking people were now toasty and warm and out of harm’s way.

   Sadly, Rootin-Tootin and Clarabelle didn’t make it but more importantly, no first responders lost their lives attempting to rescue them. They knew the risks of pulling the lever of the devil’s slot machine hoping to win praise and admiration from their neighbors. Instead it took their lives.

   Again, thank you for playing.

Tired of Rejection Letters? Tired of your best work being turned down? Then click the link below and watch this FREE video. It may be just what you’re looking for.

Monday, December 3, 2012

Intelligent Design is NOT Creationism

   I believe that everyone has a right to their core beliefs with the exception of one topic; Science. You may choose what deity, or lack thereof, you wish to subscribe to but you don’t get to choose your science. Real science is provable facts verified by empirical evidence and the ability to replicate those results by others.

   I do not believe in Creationism because real science has proved that the world was not created in 6 days but that instead has evolved and changed considerably over billions of years. Real science has also shown that some animals have evolved and changed to adapt to their environment

   What Real Science hasn’t proven is that man has evolved from the ape or has any genetic attachment to any heretofore believed ancestors (Neanderthal, Java man, etc.) Although many claims have been made that we (the Cro-Magnon) carry the DNA of the Neanderthal, there has been NO empirical evidence to that theory.  In the attempts claiming to show a link, the evidence is so minute and so laden with the possibility of outside corruption, that no court in any country would accept such finding as evidence to prove or disprove anything.

   Still many members of the scientific community continue to claim we evolved from apes.

   Attention Scientific Community! Stop making these claims until you verify it with solid provable evidence. Just because you want to believe something, and it has some similarities to other scientific evidence, doesn’t make it scientific fact. Stick to the facts or risk doing to the respected field of science what Fox News did to the once respected field of journalism. And as for proving Mankind’s evolution… frankly, I don’t think you can because here’s what I think happened:

   I believe we were visited by a superior race who, although our atmosphere didn’t support their species, it did permit them to splice their genes with creatures already here.

   (I can already hear the scoff-scoff, ridicule-ridicule smug dismissal, apparently ignoring the fact that we do it all the time. You’ve all likely seen that human ear growing on the back of a mouse)

   And so these advanced visitors started this project by wiping out the dinosaurs. (The meteor theory doesn’t wash because that only would have wiped out land bound dinosaurs not the equal amount that were living in the sea, yet they disappeared at the same time) With the dinosaurs gone they started gene splicing on larger animals (which is why there is also no known link between the sabertooth tiger and today's tiger as well as no link between the Wooly Mammoth and today's elephant. Then they moved on to create the early stages of man and as the technology progressed, improved upon it, bringing about Java and Neanderthal. With each improvement they wiped out the earlier version, (which is why Neanderthal disappeared shortly after we, Cro-Magnon, arrived.

   Now lets take this theory one step further. Scientists have theorized that the Sphinx, unlike the pyramids, which were constructed many years later, may be as old as 36 thousand years, which is approximately the time we showed up. So considering the fact that we were all primitive cavemen at the time, who built it?

   You’ve all heard of Atlantis haven’t you? Plato mentioned it in his dialogues. And what about the Mayans? They supposedly built these elaborate pyramids and had this advanced system of mathematics yet these same technically advanced people were ritualistically murdering each other at an unbelievable rate.

   Doesn’t quite add up does it? 

   Then suddenly these superior beings disappear taking all their stuff with them.

   I worked in corporate for many years and frankly, when a project’s budget is pulled, the offices are vacated, the equipment removed and the prototypes put into storage with the occasional review to see if any part of it can be cannibalized to further advance an existing one.

   Which brings us to UFO sightings.

   Now here is where my theory runs into trouble. I don’t believe in intergalactic travel because Einstein’s theory of relativity shows that to be impossible.

   But that’s only a theory.

   As is mine regarding how we got here.

   Same for Evolution. 

Are you a writer frustrated by rejection letters even though your work is top-notch? Perhaps you're making errors you're not aware of and as such, being dropped from consideration by the college interns brought in to wade through query letters and sample chapters. Want to have your manuscript seen by the decision makers? Then click on this link and watch the free video. 

Monday, November 26, 2012

Just How Stupid Are You? Let's Find Out.

    I see you’ve accepted my challenge.
   At last, a worthy opponent.
   In addition, you have proven yourself to be a person of intellectual curiosity. It’s not  many people who, when faced with that question, would answer:  Yes! I WOULD like to know just how stupid I am.
   It also shows you’re a person of self-respect and courage. A person who knows EXACTLY how stupid they are and is willing to confront anyone who dares to challenge that belief.
   It also proves that you’re a realist. You’re a person who says: “Give it to me straight, doc.  I can take it. Just HOW stupid am I?” No sugar coating for you.

   But most importantly, It’s proof you’re no stupider than I am because whenever I see a questionnaire that poses questions like the above or: Are You A Real Man? Take This Test And Find Out. I take that test. Why? Because if it turns out that I’m a Fake man. I would want to know. OR when it poses questions like: Have You Suffered Memory Loss Since Turning 50?

   Well of course not! I’m just as vibrant and sharp as I was in my twenties. And to prove it, I’m going to take that test just as soon as I remember where I saw it. 

   But I will admit that sometimes, I’m not a clever as I’d like to believe. Why? Because every time I click on one of those questionnaires, it turns out to be a come-on for some product they’re selling. 

   Sorry about that, but since you’re already here. Why not see what I have to offer, because sometimes a sales pitch features a product you’ve been looking for and can actually use!

   So here we go.
   Are you a writer who’s struggling to get his/her book published but is getting routinely rejected? Do you know someone who wants to write a book but doesn’t know where to start? Do YOU have a story to tell that the world needs to hear?

   The problem is literary agents and publishers are swamped with book proposals, query letters, sample chapters and outlines. Far more than they can ever read. So, they bring in college kids as interns to wade through the queries, proposals and slush piles and they automatically reject any manuscript containing common grammatical and spelling errors most people aren’t aware they’re making!

   Many manuscripts are rejected just for having the wrong font, letter size or incorrect spacing!

   Others for not knowing the ‘first five pages’ rule. Or including an “As you know, Bob.”

   Do you know what’s wrong with the following sentences?

   The movie trailer peaked Bob’s interest.

   Once in power, the dictator placed the country under Marshall law.
   “Stop yelling at me!” She said.

   The people reading your manuscript do and because of those errors they’re rejecting the book you’ve spent the last year or so working on.

   Want to avoid being scratched from the race before even getting to the starting gate? 
   Then click on the link below and watch the GET PUBLISHED video. It just might be the very thing you need to make the jump from struggling artist to published author.

Monday, November 19, 2012

The Adventures of Cluelessman!

   Among my many varied and spectacular personality flaws, I believe the most prominent is my inability to take a hint. Although it’s true men are notoriously well-known for this personality defect, I have taken it to new heights of cluelessness.

   It’s not intentional, it’s just that subtle hints  are about as effective on me as a pea shooter on a Bull elephant.  I’ve wondered why that was and suspect it’s because the information I received as a child is in conflict with the realities of the real world.
   I was a kid back in the day when men were respectful of women. They tipped their hats when a woman passed by, held doors, the ‘ladies first’ rule was in play and sex was something that was only done after marriage.

   Women were taught that having sex before marriage got you labeled as a whore.

   (Where I grew up it was pronounced as ‘who-wah’) and men didn’t date promiscuous women because they were considered ‘damaged goods’ and poor wife material.

   At this point I would like to respectfully ask my female readers to take a deep breath and remember I was a kid at the time and also a victim. Please note the ‘children should be seen and not heard’ rule was in effect, therefore leaving me powerless.

   Moving right along.

   When I discovered rock and roll it became my obsession. I taught myself how to play guitar and immediately headed to New York’s Greenwich Village to join the music scene. Now here’s where it gets weird. Especially if you keep in mind that as a kid I was programmed by nuns and priests in a parochial school and heavily influenced by the heretofore mentioned chivalrous treatment of woman.

   The girls started hinting their interest in me but I never picked up on it. They’d say things like, “My parents are going to my Aunt’s house Friday night, probably won’t get home till late.” And I’d reply, “Hey, that’s great. We can go to the late show at the movies!” And then pat myself on the back for maneuvering her into some back row kissing action.

   Once I was on a date with a girl and as we sat down at the restaurant I noticed these black marks on her arms.  I mentioned it and she waved it off and said, “Oh that. Well, sometimes the voices make me do things I shouldn’t.”
   I nodded, said “ yeah” and asked her what she’d like to order.

   Another time I started dating this waitress in a club I worked at and she took me home. When I got there I noticed articles clearly belonging to a man throughout the apartment. When I mentioned it, she said “That’s my boyfriend’s stuff. But don’t worry about it, he’s a hustler. When she noticed my concern she added, “Really it's okay. He brings dates here all the time.”

   The next day when I mentioned this to my prostitute friend, Lori, she said, “Idiot. A hustler is a guy who has sex with men for money. She’s banging a guy who’s banging guys.”

   Then there are the times I THINK I’m being hinted at and am completely wrong. I was dating this woman who, I thought, was into me. She was calling me at work to say hello and was doing nice things like inviting me over for dinner. But when I made a move while we were sitting on her couch in her apartment, she reacted like I was some pervert who had groped her on the subway.   

   Then there was the girl I was very much attracted to but who made it clear (at least that’s what I thought) she wasn’t interested in me romantically. We’d play tennis, and check out bands and go for drives, and during these occasions she’d regale me with tales of what guys she was dating or involved with and how she couldn’t make up her mind who she was serious about. I wasn’t the least bit interested so I tuned her out.

   I met her years later after I had married and she asked why I had never made a play for her. Stunned, I reminded her that every time we’d hang out she complain bout some guy she was dating. Clearly startled by my answer, she stared at me and said, “Yeah, I know. I was trying to let you know that I wasn’t happy with them so you’d make a play for me. Duh!”
   And so I am seriously considering buying a cape, and a spandex shirt with a big letter C on the chest, then, when entering a room filled with women, I will paraphrase Underdog’s catch phrase and say, “There’s no need to fear, Cluelessman is here!” 

Monday, November 12, 2012

Okay! Okay! I'll Be The Next Damn President!

   Yes, admittedly I have been referred to as a ‘Smarty Pants’ and a Mr. Know-It-All but I never thought such labels would cause the American people to turn to me for leadership.
   And although I did solve the gay marriage issue
   As well as the proper taxation issue for job providers
    How cops should deal with the mentally ill
   I only did it because I love my country and apparently, it needed my help.
   However… since it is probably inevitable, I would like President Obama to take these measures now, so everything I’ll need will be in place following my inauguration.

   First, Convert the Military: We are still building massive city-sized aircraft carriers and destroyers that cost billions to make and millions more to run. We are still under the mindset that our freedom depends on a strong military force patrolling the globe, ready to fight the Nazis, Nips and Commie bastards who are spending every waking moment plotting to take from us our precious freedom.
   The problem is they don’t exist anymore. Yet we’re still building bigger and more powerful planes and boats and missiles so we can obliterate those evil doers who are already dead.
   Stop it! Stop building those enormous aircraft carriers and destroyers, all of which can be vaporized by ONE NUCLEAR MISSILE.
   Just one.
   And how many does Russia have? 10,000 you say? China? 200?  And do either want to go to war with us? No. Why? Because Russia is still digging its way out of the collapse of Communism and the Chinese are too busy spending our money.
   But there is a very real enemy out there and it’s one we are presently defenseless against. It has killed hundreds of thousands in the last decade, caused trillions of dollars in property damage and has brought about more destruction and misery than any nuclear armed enemy, and its attacks are becoming more frequent.
   And if you can stop chanting U-S-A, U-S-A for just a moment, I’ll tell who that enemy is.
   It’s Mother Nature  and she’s killing us and destroying our land at a horrific rate.
   According to a just-released study by the Pentagon, reported by the New York Times, the increasing climate change will likely cause food, fuel and medicinal shortages throughout the globe. If you look at the destruction caused by Hurricanes Katrina, Irene and Superstorm Sandy, if you look at the Japanese Tsunami, the Indonesian Tsunami, the earthquakes in Haiti and China,you will see the need to refocus our resources to combat an enemy that is attacking us now, and not one that may or may not appear somewhere down the road.   
   So dry dock the monster ships, hanger the monster planes, silo the missiles and start retraining our soldiers into emergency response teams that will specialize in evacuations, road clearance, setting up temporary shelters, food distribution, power restoration and search and rescue. Instead of building aircraft carriers, we build massive sump pumps to protect major cities from flooding, and power them with wind turbines. We build transportable monster cranes and bulldozers to quickly clear earthquake damaged areas.
   Build earthquake proof monorail high-speed trains to quickly transport needed supplies and pipelines to irrigate drought stricken areas throughout the nation.
   Go full speed into natural gas production and refit our vehicles to run on it. Why? Because of the 4 major users of oil, China, Russia, India and the US, we are furthest away and with the Middle East’s political situation already tenuous, a major earthquake or tsunami could easily grind oil production to a halt, seriously crippling our ability to feed our people or provide power for our machinery and that scenario is far more likely to occur than an invasion from a foreign nation.  
   Act now. As your future president, I’m counting on you.

As always, if you enjoy my blog, join, comment or read a free sample of my books by clicking on the slideshow above. If you like the sample, download the rest to your electronic device and if at some point you decide you don’t like it, it comes with a money back guarantee, (USA residents only)  So with nothing to lose why not download your copy today?

Monday, November 5, 2012

Before Voting Tuesday, Read This.

   Those who read my blog know that politically, I am a Radical Moderate, and by that, I mean I usually vote for the less insane of the two. I have voted for Ronald Reagan 2x, George Bush sr. 1x, Bill Clinton 1x, Ross Perot 2x, George Dubya Bush 1x and Barrack Obama 1x. I strongly support the 2nd amendment and a woman’s right to choose. I am a practicing Catholic, yet I support gay marriage. I want all illegal immigrants thrown out yet I fully support anyone who enters this country and legally applies for citizenship. My allegiance isn’t to a particular party; but to the candidate who I believe can get this country safely through the next 4 years.
   I do not post anything political I haven’t verified through a reliable source. I firmly believe that anyone who posts political messages they know to be false or misleading, is a traitor and a disgrace.
   My disappointment with President Obama has been his inability to fight for what he supposedly believes in. He could have called out his political enemies and went head to head. No, he took a conciliatory stance and called for bipartisanship.
   I voted for Ronald Reagan twice, not because I supported his political views, because I disagreed with a good many of them. I voted for him because he was willing to take a stand. The one thing I admired about the man was you always knew where he stood. He said he would fire the air traffic controllers and to everyone’s astonishment, he did. He called for Gorbachev to tear down the Berlin Wall. He didn’t ask for permission or try to build a coalition, he just did it. Through the sheer force of his personality, through sheer tenacity, he brought both sides to the table and to me, that’s what makes a great president.
   Sadly Barack Obama will never be a great president.
   But he has been a competent one.  
   When he took office the country was rapidly careening toward another Great Depression. People who had held the same job for decades had been downsized the year before with no prospects on the horizon. ( I was one of them) We were fighting 2 wars and were hemorrhaging money. The banks were failing, the car companies failing, Walls Street was in shambles. Financial forecasters were predicting a complete meltdown. There have been only 2 presidents who took office under similar horrific circumstances. Abraham Lincoln and Franklin D. Roosevelt and it took Roosevelt 12 years to pull the country out of the Great Depression.
   And while our nation was teetering on the edge of financial collapse and needed to pull together, the Republicans became the party of NO. Republican leader Mitch McConnell said shortly after the election: “The only responsibility of the Republican party is to see that Barack Obama a one term president.”
   I have been voting since the 1972 election and in all that time, never has the opposing party EVER flatly refused to work with a newly elected president. To say I was furious would be putting it mildly.
   How dare the these sonsabitches defy the will of the American people! Who you like, or do not like, doesn’t matter. As Americans, as people who believe in our constitution, we accept whomever is elected and do our best to support him. I hated that George Dubya Bush won a second term but when he did, I accepted it.
   The more I see of Jersey governor Chris Christy the more I like. He has the personality of a real leader. He doesn’t need approval or coalitions, he steps up and gets the job done. As it stands, if he runs in 2016, I will vote for him.
   But for now, I will vote for President Obama. I have studied the candidates carefully and verified their positions by watching their speeches and researching their past performances. Mitt Romney has waffled on nearly every issue, I don’t know where he stands on abortion, or on social security. He refuses to release his tax returns. He created Romneycare but denies its bastard son, Obamacare. He wants to pump more money into the military, but who does he plan to use it on? The Soviet Union is gone. And we owe China too much money for them to want to attack us. Yet we still spend more money on the military than China, Russia, England and France combined.
    My real concern however is Paul Ryan. I have never seen a politician so eager to destroy every social program that benefits the middle class. So determined to force his religious and political beliefs on this nation. I understand difficult economic times make people angry and resentful. They fall into lock step with extremists because they want everyone to know how pissed off they are.
   This happened during the Great Depression. Not here in the US, but in Germany where their currency, the Deutsche Mark had become valueless and their government was in shambles. So they elected someone who promised to turn things around. And he did. Unfortunately at the cost of 50 million lives.
   Here’s how my math works. The way I see it, the Republicans will hold on to the House and the Democrats will hold on to the Senate. If Obama is elected, things will remain the same, slow growth and high debt. If Romney is elected, he’ll have the same problems except, this time the Dems will be the party of NO.
   If Romney is elected and for some reason doesn’t finish his term, Paul Ryan would become president. He would immediately use his very wealthy supporters to force the moderate Republicans into supporting his programs and unleash a tidal wave of anti-Democrat propaganda. This would undoubtedly bring rioting and violence onto our streets because Americans never give up their rights without a fight. And it wouldn’t be the hippie, non-violent protests of the past, there will be bloodshed and a lot of it.
   However, if Biden were to assume the presidency it would be the return of Gerald Ford, no doubt giving the Republican an easy win in 2016.
   I don’t believe what I wrote here will change anyone’s mind and I’m sure many will be furious at my choice but I did the research, I put in the time, and I ignored the biased media. I fulfilled my responsibility as an American and have no doubt you will do the same.  

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

I Could've Saved Everyone on the Titanic. Here's How

   Because this year commemorated the 100 year anniversary of the sinking of the Titanic, there was a considerable coverage of that memorable event. In my previous blog I noted that, in the past, people were more polite and courteous. I’m beginning to believe however that it was our ancestors’ colossal pride and fear of being viewed as cowardly that got 1502 passengers killed that fateful day. It appears they decided drowning in icy waters was preferable to showing worry or concern about their predicament.

   I’m not a Titanic buff; there are those who can give an accounting of every minute, following the striking of the iceberg. In this case, such detail isn’t necessary. There was only one problem they needed to solve once the ship began sinking, and that was ‘How do we get all these people off the ship and onto another floating vessel.’ The nearest vessel, The Carpathia was reported to be 4 hours away. At the rate the ship was sinking, their rescuers would not arrive in time.

   Now here’s where the weirdness comes into play. We all know the Titanic didn’t have enough lifeboats to accommodate all the passengers, but it was reported that most of the lifeboats launched were only partially filled. 

   How in blazes did that happen? When offered a seat on the lifeboat did several hundred turn it down? Did someone say, “Thank for the offer, Hiram, but I’m going to wait for the next one. Don’t want to seem too anxious to stay alive and not drown in freezing waters.”

   And what was with those jackaninnie musicians who, as the ship was sinking, continued to play?

   Seriously? If I was on that ship and saw that, I would have stormed over and said, “You know, as much as I enjoy a rousing rendition of ‘Waltzing Matilda,’ Ephraim, I believe your time could be better spent helping me rip these bathtubs out of the first class cabins, plugging the drain holes and getting people off this sinking deathtrap!”
   That’s right, there were bathtubs in the first class cabins that could easily be converted into life rafts.

   “Okay, fine,” you might say, “but there weren’t enough to save all 1500.”
   “Au contraire,” I would reply, showing my mastery of the Spanish language.

   You see, the only way to save all 1500 would be to transfer those presently on the lifeboats to another vessel then come back for the others. There was sufficient time.    

   The Titanic took several hours to sink. The problem however, was there was no other vessel in the area to transfer them to.

   But there was. And I’m not talking about the SS Californian that was reportedly within range but hadn’t received the Titanic’s distress call.
   The other floating vessel I’m referring to was as big as the Titanic, was stationary and could accommodate all the passengers until help arrived.

   What is that vessel you ask?

   The iceberg.

   I’m amazed that no one thought of the iceberg as a safe haven. It certainly was big enough, and if you doubt that just remember, it was so large and stationary, it ripped a huge hole into the side of the thickest hull ever created.

   But perhaps the iceberg was totally submerged.

   Nope . Do the ice cube test. Fill your sink with water then take some ice cubes from the ice cube tray and drop them in. The widest part of the cube will always flip to the top and rise to the surface.

   And think about just how large it must have been! It didn’t give way when struck by the biggest ship in history. Instead it ripped the Titanic wide open.

   So to recap. Boat hits iceberg. Instead of pretending I’m not the least bit frightened, I step up, tell those in the lifeboats to take the passengers to the iceberg, drop them off, then come back and get the others. In the meantime, I’d have the bathtubs ripped out, plugged tight then set to sea to join the others.
   It’s a shame I wasn’t there. If I was, Leonardo DiCaprio would still be alive.

If you enjoy my blog why not stop by my Facebook page and click the LIKE button